I had such a nice time at the FemDom Circle in Hartford, CT last night. Yesterday, I was frustrated because I have been finding Myself playing with submissive men who are not in 24/7/365 service to Me. If you are a regular reader of this blog, you must understand that I am a woman and do live within My emotions and feelings. I am not trying to be something I am not, I am not trying to pretend I am not an emotional human being, and I am certainly not trying to pretend I desire something different than complete control.
It is hard to not have complete control. I guess what makes this fact difficult for Me is that I am addicted to complete control. I know this will sound really odd but I swear this is the truth. I get depressed when a short amount of time passes and I have no one around to play with and control. That is what happened yesterday.
Although yesterday, I was ready to pack up My submissive boy’s bags and send them on their way to please all the vanilla girls in the world. After visiting the My wonderful and supportive friends, I realized one huge thing. Each submissive, each one serves his own purpose to Me. When I spoke with other lifestyle Domme’s, it was clear I have no need to send any submissive boy I care about packing forever. Their availability for My continued use of them is important in My personal quest in My own dominance.
The other thing I realize is that I am using the wrong sort of wording in My search for My 24/7/365 slavery Although it is true that in seeking your life playmate, there is some normal sort of “dating” that happens but really what I am doing is “interviewing” perspective 24/7/365 slaves. When speaking to other lifestyle Dommes, they are clear about one thing, they interviewed a LARGE number of perspective sub’s in person before choosing the slave that would be best for Her own personal needs and desires. Once their match was found, they made him owned fairly quickly sometimes by use of immediate chastity. Then they figured out the details later.
So, world, I shall continue. I am re-inspired to find My 24/7/365 slaveboy and I am confident that through an extensive interview process, that I will meet My match. In the meantime, I will take the Empress’ advice from last night as we all sat around the dinner table being served by the submissive’s, “Have fun”. I like that advice.
Mistress Lynne 3/16/14